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My Wait Leads to Regret




The morning was hit by dawn, in the crack of the window curtains pierced the room. Waking me up while dreams were still hobbled in the imagination. Not in the least of my voices, it seemed that nature chose to mute from its universe.

A little disappointed when my morning dream was hit. Hope to be spliced with a new episode, and still about the same theme. But never mind, everything is just a mere picture.

Still like the previous days, cooking water to brew coffee. It seems that coffee has become a tradition in itself for me. It's been around for a long time, and it hasn't faded over time.

While waiting for the water to boil, I slowly opened the window curtains. Without the slightest disturbing the timing of the still frozen door. I saw a bright morning dawn and had a blessing in front of the window glass.
"Your presence dawned on me without thinking about what would happen if you came, but the presence of the beautiful beautiful girl I still doubt. I didn't know that yet. For I am still languishing for the wait for his arrival."

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About 30 minutes passed and the water was already boiling. I brewed a cup of coffee that morning. I enjoyed it non-stop as I looked at the blushing dawn of the morning. Half of that coffee was already scraping my memory. A memory I never expected to come. However, the morning coffee invited him unceremoniously. It may be too early to yearn for, too early to meet. But only through memory can I break through his shadow. Remembered me of that girl, the girl I was looking forward to all the time. For drinking dreamily, coffee warns me with its heat. She made my lips bruised red. But that's okay, because if I'm mad at him, I don't know who else is accompanying my wait this time.

After the curtains of the room window opened, it was the next turn for Kubuka to open. It seems that the dawn in the blind morning is slowly being replaced. It was a little hot and gripping everything in my body.
No longer a novelty, the scorching heat of the sun was like lunch in that cramped room. Often I took shelter without hesitation, leaning my head against the first branch of a tree on the porch of the narrow room. Hope it's not another tree later that I'm the most comfortable backing on and hopefully the girl can replace the tree. Because in my opinion, the only one who can replace his position is the girl I have always looked forward to.
"I've tried my way to wait, I hope you don't upset me to the point of regret."

Waiting is not an easy thing, especially if one gives a long enough time to receive the taste in the mind of the burning soul.
Like a lunatic who speaks without anyone by his side. But what's the power, that's all I'm capable of doing.

The day passed in the evening. The night is also not still, does not harbor all sorrow and does not reject all emptiness. Too quiet without a sound, it felt empty to stab me in that narrow space. However, with my bare hands I grabbed a worn-out piece of paper with the ink of an old pen left over from my grandfather's memories.

What I wrote is no longer about my past. Especially about your past. However, what is certain is that I wrote down everything about me and you. It's you who gives me time to look forward to and I'm the one who is tormented by it all. The time you gave me may be too long, it's been stuck for a long time waiting and waiting for what's next.

The night was getting deeper, in my third of the night you came with a message note whose ringtone sound was rhythmic.
"Goodnight sis. Sorry to just be on my WhatsApp again."
"Good night is also my sweet girl. I haven't given you any news for almost a month, what's the matter?"
"Sorry sis, too much busyness."
"Alright. I have been waiting for you for too long. What about my pintaku at that time?"
"Oh yes, sis. Almost forgot again."
"It's okay. But have you had time to answer it. I've been stuck in this wait for too long?"
"yes, sis. Sorry if it makes you have to wait with time. And I'm sorry for everything too. Too much gives you hope, so you have to wait. Tonight, behind the moon I declared everything. I'm sorry, I can't leave my heart for you sis."

The wait so far has been in vain. I didn't have time to answer him that night. The moon that was originally shining is now dim again. So it is with asaku. Dissolved in the wait to forget to go home looking and staring back at the morning dawn on the side of the curtain. It turned out to be true, it should have been from the beginning that I realized. That what I'm looking forward to shouldn't be you anymore. But I was complacent about it all.

"Trying to keep me waiting for you. From dawn to dusk, from night to dark, all I have is a row of regrets."


."$$$".

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