My Experiments With Trust

"Sir, please trust me, I have applied for this position because I want to experience trust as Tata means trust" - his voice on the other end of telecon was clear but somehow his words lacked that genuine 'smell of trust', if you know what I mean. It was a telephonic interview for recruiting a candidate for a middle management position. We got a background verification done and found that the candidate had been asked to resign from his current organisation due to unethical practices. He was immediately dropped from the shortlisted list.

One of my many experiments with trust.

Have you ever realised that a few people exude trust and others simply do not? Trust has nothing to do with written or verbal communications and confirmations. Trust is something that has a 'texture and smell' of its own, which can be felt and not necessarily be described. Like a whiff of perfume, some people radiate this and others do not. A person may confirm and reconfirm something in writing and may still not be trust worthy (he is hiding something or twisting the words to safeguard him against something that he does not want us to be explained about) and another one may appear more trustworthy despite not having any formal affirmations due to his unflinching character and an air of openness about him. Am sure you might have come across this...

'Trust' is the most widely - and probably the most loosely - word ever used in corporate world. Name any organisation and you will find trust as being one of the core values or having found a mention in the mission statement. This is one of my favourite words and I always dedicate at least 2 hours to this amazing word while conducting any of my management workshops with the people in our organisation. As the late Stephen Covey said "Trust is the glue of life, It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It is the foundation principle that holds all the relationships together". This includes both personal and professional relationships...

There is no shortcut to trust. As people say - it takes a life to build trust and just a moment to shatter it all. Trust has to be earned and it takes time. I had gone to meet a senior executive of a company last month and while waiting in the lounge, a quote from its founder caught my attention-"don't set your name to anything you will ever have cause to be ashamed of". It was a message that Henry Timken, the founder of anti-friction tapper roller bearings in USA had imbibed from his father. It is found in all their global offices.

Being in Tatas, I find this word in our mission, vision and value statements. But is it so cheap that it can be found everywhere and in every human being?

I remember an instance a few years ago when we were looking for a senior candidate for a crucial position. It was that of a business unit head and we really needed to fill up the vacancy fast with a suitable candidate. There was this candidate who was found okay at different stages of the interview and was finally selected. We got his medical done and it was all fine. He also accepted the offer in writing. Now it was his turn to send us a copy of his resignation from the current organisation and give us a date of joining. He sent a written communication mentioning the exact date of his joining. However, somehow we were still not getting the smell of 'trust' here. He seemed to be clever but not trustworthy. He sent 2-3 emails emphasising and re-emphasising the date of his joining but while speaking with him over phone, we realised that something was missing every time we spoke. The fact that he had still not sent his letter of resignation was just one of the reasons. There was something in this entire chain of interactions spread over 3 months which was not right. My second 'experiment with trust' - or rather mistrust- was complete when he backed out with a 'deep sense of apology' before the date of joining. It was obvious that he had used our offer to negotiate a better deal with his current employer. He called us and narrated a long story of how there were a few family issues involving his son, daughter and wife and he was truly apologetic about not joining. As I heard him say all these concocted stories described with lot of 'fake emotions' by him, I knew I was talking to a dubious junkie for whom the smell of money taken at gun point mattered more than commitment and trust. One of those millions who can speak of trust untiringly without knowing that they are simply not trustworthy. We blacklisted him for ever.

Needless to say, we had kept another candidates shortlisted and 'warmed up' and went ahead with another selection realising it was a good riddance. Remember what would have happened had he been recruited..

My yet another experiment with trust (read mistrust).

But there are numerous other experiments where the 'leap of trust' succeeded.

Merriam Webster defines trust as "to believe that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, effective, etc.: to have confidence in (someone or something)". Yet another favourite definition of trust for me is - "Trust is a positive expectation that another will not-by words, actions or decisions-act opportunistically".

Let us close our eyes for a few moments and think of the most ethical person we have ever met. What were the special characteristics you associated or currently associate with the person? I am sure a few key words which will come here invariably are (Here 'he' should be read as both 'he/she', or for that matter in this entire article. Trust is not gender biased)

The person is honest
I always know where he stands
When he says he will do something, I can bank on him
He never played people against people
He will be say no if he does not like something that I said, without bothering about I will like it or not
He will stand by certain principles in life
Very less chances that he will reveal something secret about others while talking to me. So I can trust him with my personal issues
(I am sure you may add more and I will be curious for your inputs..)
The other side of trust is being trusted. We are trusted only when others think us worthy of their trust. There are practical advantages and emotional rewards of being trusted that provide incentives to being trustworthy. People who trust us give us greater leeway because they don't need rules and contracts to assure that we will meet our obligations. This is true both ways. If people trust us, they will be fast and dependable while helping us fulfil our goals. This is especially true in case of team work. I can say from my professional experience that those team members whom I trusted were a far more valuable resource than a few whom I somehow could not (due to various behavioural traits). The team members who trust us will believe us, even if what we said was inconsistent with the statements of others and even if what we tell them seems implausible. They always came out with the best solutions, year after year, carved by their passionate commitment and not out of heartless thinking just out of the compulsion of duty. They were my star performers and I always relished working with these team members. The power of trust can be miraculous but earning it can be as herculean a task if we fake it.

Being trusted is also emotionally satisfying. It enhances our self-esteem and validates our good character. In professional affairs, trust is a valuable asset but in intimate personal relationships, it is indispensable.

Trust is a very scarce and extremely precious asset especially in today's world and should be handled and distributed with utmost care. If this can be built in the cultural fabric of an organisation, it can prove to a formidable force behind the success of the organization. I wonder when I see organisations undervaluing this.

And hence 'my experiments with trust' continue...


 By Arun Singh


Article Source: My Experiments With Trust

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